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Last week I led a monthly implementation session with a firm that I have been coaching for a few years now. The attorney was not on the call (home with a sick child) but it ended up being a GREAT call with the team. The topic was on how to handle the consistent “interruption of calls”. This is something that this particular firm has been struggling with for 6 months now. And not uncommon from most other firms out there. There’s a saying amongst team, “business would be great, but for the clients.”

A few minutes into the call I had to stop the team: “Time out, walk me through the process of how you route calls.” I had to reel the team back in. They were all talking over one another and throwing words around like “system” and “steps.”  They were speaking into a huge amount of right/wrong – who said it should be done this way versus that way – what the receptionist is doing (and not doing). 

What I loved so much about this implementation session is how easily a neutral, unattached party can simply anchor a group of committed teammates back to the process, after listening to them and keeping the reasoning to SERVING THE CLIENT. But the group lost sight of that, they were so focused on what the system said, what this teleconference said, at last year’s retreat someone at lunch said, etc. All the while, the clients weren’t feeling heard and acknowledged because each person was so committed to “the way.”

The role of a “coach” is to actively listen for the things not really being said while holding the space to lead the group back to the tools available to support them in implementing the breakthroughs achieved during the call – versus cramming systems to end the very, very necessary healthy debates. That is where the promised lands lay, in the healthy debate. The role of a coach is not to provide immediate solutions to end the turmoil.  Systems are a phenomenal support mechanism – but only when the facilitator seeks first to understand. 

Often on our CCI calls we hear the confusion between “Molly said, Dave said, so and so said”.  The beauty of the CCI program is we are all going to have slightly different viewpoints on the minor details we find firms hung up on – because there isn’t one right answer, especially on such minor things like they were stuck on – should I take a message and hand it to Mickey, or should I have the receptionist better screen the call or should I take the info down and hand it to Mickey.

At the end of the day; declare a way you’re going to try on, test it, meet again in 30 days and make necessary refinements if needed. But until you decide to put an end to the “he said/she said”, that will always be a roadblock and quite frankly an excuse for not getting started. In all honesty, if your team leader commits to trying one standard approach that you will track and discuss in your weekly team meetings, you cannot mess it up. That is the birthplace of a system.

Molly L. Hall, Co-Founder, Lawyers with Purpose, LLC, and author of Don’t Be a Yes Chick: How to Stop Babysitting Your Boss, Transform Your Job and Work with a Dream Team Without Losing Your Sanity or Your Spirit in the Process.

I was thrilled last Thursday when my team, the Syracuse Orange, handed Indiana, the No. 1 seed in the Eastern Bracket, a defining loss. What I didn't expect was what occurred next. On Friday when I got home from work, my son said, "Dad, is there any chance we can go down to Washington, D.C. to see Syracuse play in the Elite 8 game?" Being that D.C. was only a six-hour drive, I did my due diligence, got tickets, and planned for a drive down and back the same day. What I didn't expect was when I went to pick up my tickets; the company I bought them from upgraded me to the front row! So there I was in the first row of the stadium right behind the Marquette team. The only downside, of course, as an SU fan, but anyone who saw the game knows it was an SU crowd anyway.

I was amazed at the physicality of basketball. Being that close to the action just less than 10 feet away from the court and hearing the grunts and seeing the physical pushing, shoving, etc., I was amazed. As a former football player and wrestler, I always attributed basketball to be a finesses sport. I learned different.

Needless to say, my orange again prevailed and progressed to the Final Four, at which point my son again said, "Dad, do you think we can go to Atlanta?" Well, without further ado, I'll be there, heading to Atlanta to the Final Four and the championship game. Look for me. I'll be waving and wearing my orange. Go SU!

David J. Zumpano, Co-founder of Lawyers With Purpose

What is the greatest success you’ve had since joining LWP?

Confidence.   LWP has forced me to work outside my comfort zone.   Proactively contacting financial advisors and professionals that serve the elderly was never a part of my business model when I started my own practice.  How foreign!  Why would they want to meet with me?  Also, before joining LWP, making a two hour presentation on a topic before a group of people would just not have happened.  LWP has given me the confidence and tools to present a very complicated topic to potential clients and referral sources in a relaxed and enjoyable, yet professional, manner that fosters, most of the time, a very interactive environment that is rewarding for the participants and also for me. 

What is your favorite LWP tool?

Hands down it would be the Med Qual Worksheet. It is pivotal.  It not only organizes my internal thinking and analysis and helps me focus on what is the most viable option for the client but is also the foundation for the value prop discussion and the means of showing your value to a potential client.  Without the Med Qual Worksheet, there is no value prop. 

How has being part of LWP impacted your team and your practice?

How has it not impacted my practice?   My practice has a comprehensive system that addresses client meetings, the legal-technical, the drafting, and delivery of services for which I was hired.   This translates into satisfied clients that you actually can see or read on their faces at the signing meeting.  Satisfied clients add to the bottom line and viability of the practice (which is putting me in a position to hire a team).   Before LWP, the practice was me and dependent on the tools, research, etc., that I may or may not have chosen for a particular matter.  It is now a distinct entity with its own operational methods, systems, etc., that is influenced marginally by my own personality and preferred methods of practice. 

I had lots of laughs once again when I got together with my family to celebrate Palm Sunday. As the youngest of ten children in a 100 percent Italian family I can always count on an exciting get together. It was a day to enjoy family; brothers, sisters, nieces and nephews and the blessing of still having my mom and dad with us (currently 88 and 87). It's amazing how quickly the time goes by when you're having fun.

Many people ask why I have my family over on Palm Sunday instead of Easter and it's quite simple. Twenty-two years ago when I got married, my wife and I agreed we would have Easter with her family, Thanksgiving with mine, and we split Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. That model has worked wonderfully for the last 22 years but more importantly, has allowed my children to grow up with both sides of our family and get to appreciate the rich traditions from each. As we celebrated Palm Sunday it gave us time to reflect on the many blessings we have in our life and on the sacrifices that others have made for us along the way.

The biggest conversation was centered on the “Casatelle” (Italian Easter bread) I made for us to enjoy. I followed the recipe and my siblings were raving about how good it was because it was so moist. My mother on the other hand was clear to point out, “This is a little too moist, you didn’t make it quite right.” The joy of growing up Italian! Below is the recipe. Make it yourself and let me know what you think:

Casatelle:

1 1/2 cup sugar
9 oz lard (or unsalted shortening)
4 1/2 to 5 cups flour
1/2 tsp salt
1 cup warm milk
1 wet yeast cake 2 oz
2 tsp vanilla
10 medium eggs

Add everything into a large bowl and mix until hands are somewhat cleaned of dough mix. Set aside. Cover with dish and blanket and put in a warm place (no drafts) until doubled in size (be sure to use large bowl to begin).

Roll when ready into greased pie plates (about 5-9 inch pans). Roll into log type pieces so as to be able to put around inside of individual pans. Cover the individual pans and let rise again (maybe 1/2 hour or so). When raised put in oven at 350 degrees for about 20 minutes. If needed lower to 325 degrees and cook 5-10 minutes or until highly browned.

Be careful not to open oven first 15 minutes (could sink).

Too many eggs will make dough too soft. Also, don't double recipe since this raises too much. May insert pre-cooked hard-boiled egg before baking for "Easter" look.

Having family is a blessing and appreciating sacrifices others have made is absolutely essential in us having the necessary gratitude for true success. So as we approach this Easter weekend I encourage you to enjoy your family and reflect on your faith, if appropriate, or others that have made sacrifices for you along the way and celebrate the greatest thing of all the love of family whatever family is to you.

David J. Zumpano, founder of Lawyers With Purpose

Working with many lawyers in their journey to become more entrepreneurial, to create a practice that is less dependent on them, there is an overwhelming theme, the fear of delegation. Many of us are afraid to delegate to others, those things we do well. I realize the lack of delegation really comes down to two core deficiencies. First, lack of trust in the people that work with us OR lack of systems to ensure that the work will be done properly and nothing will be inadvertently omitted.

As we look at the first issue, trusting the people that work with us, the question is whose challenge is it, theirs or ours? More specifically is that they don’t have the skill to do the work or is it that they haven’t been trained properly on how to do it. If it’s lack of skill, the solution is easy, terminate and move on to the next one, if it’s lack of training, the challenge is a little greater because now you are usually the only one that can do the training, and who has time for that? You must find the time because it never ends. If we don’t train others properly, then we must assume responsibility for the rest of the time that we will need to commit to do the work. Isn’t it worth a little up-front effort to train a person, with the necessary skills, that you trust? As my dad always said, “An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure”.

As we look at the second challenge, proper system structure is a critical piece to confidently delegating. Even if you have trained skilled employees to delegate your duties, you are still at risk that something might be dropped, forgotten, or failed to be completed. That’s where a good system, tracking each core need that you serve, and the fulfillment of it, are absolutely essential. While this appears to be daunting, in reality, you’re doing it anyway. Restated, the things you need to delegate need to be communicated to the delegatee anyway. It’s just the method in which you delegate it that must change.

For example instead of it being verbal, it must be in your contact management system to ensure there’s a record of it. Once it’s in your contact management system the information can be reviewed upon your need, by generating the appropriate report. Secondarily, once delegated the person delegated to, has to do that which was asked. Again, nothing changes, other than when they do it, it needs to be entered into your contact management system to track that it was done. Once everything is entered into your contact management system then you can retract that information any time you need to identify what is pending and what has been completed.

It sounds daunting, but if you don’t start, you never finish. Even better, we have already built the systems, processes, tracking, and training so you don’t have to.

Dave J. Zumpano

I recently attended a leadership workshop that spoke of Emotional Intelligence (EQ). The day started with a conversation on how Emotional Intelligence helps you build stronger relationships, succeed at work, and achieve your goals.

Emotional intelligence is the ability to identify, use, understand and manage emotions in positive ways to relieve (not eliminate) stress, communicate effectively, empathize with others, overcome challenges and refract conflict.

Emotional intelligence impacts the way we behave and the way we interact with others. Emotional intelligence consists of four attributes:

Self-awareness – Recognize your own emotions and how they affect your thoughts and behavior while knowing your strengths and weaknesses.

Self-management – Controlling rash behaviors, managing your emotions in healthy ways, follow through on commitments, and adapt to changing circumstances.

Social awareness – Understanding the emotions, needs, and concerns of other people, staying present to pick up on emotional cues while recognizing the power dynamics in a group.

Relationship management – Develop and maintain virtuous relationships, communicate clearly, inspire others, work well in a team, and manage conflict.

As we know, it’s not the smartest people that are the most successful. We all know folks whom are academically brilliant and yet are socially inept and unsuccessful at work or in their personal relationships. Intellectual intelligence or IQ isn’t enough on its own to be successful in life. IQ can help you get into college but it’s EQ that will help you manage the stress and emotions of sitting your final exams.

In order to permanently change behavior in ways that stand up under pressure, you need to learn how to take advantage of the powerful emotional parts of the brain that remain active and accessible even in times of stress. This means that you can’t just “study” or read about emotional intelligence to “get” it. You have to experience and practice the skills in your everyday life.

Develop your stress busting skills by working through the following three steps:

Realize when you’re stressed – The first step to reducing stress is recognizing what stress feels like. How does your body feel when you’re stressed? Are your muscles or stomach tight or sore? Are your hands clenched? Is your breath shallow? Being aware of your physical response to stress will help regulate tension when it occurs.

Find your stress response – Everyone reacts differently to stress. If you tend to become angry or agitated under stress, you will respond best to stress relief activities that quiet you down. If you tend to become depressed or withdrawn, you will respond best to stress relief activities that are stimulating. If you tend to freeze—speeding up in some ways while slowing down in others—you need stress relief activities that provide both comfort and stimulation.

Find stress-busting tools that work for you – The best way to reduce stress quickly is by engaging your senses: sight, sound and touch for example. Each person responds differently to sensory input, so find things that are soothing and/or energizing to you. If you’re a visual person you can relieve stress by quickly viewing a powerful quote or photo you have hanging in your office. If auditory, music, or the sound of a motivational speaker helps to quickly reduce your stress levels.

High levels of stress will get in the way of your ability to accurately “read” a situation, hear what someone else is saying, be aware of your own feelings and needs, and communicate clearly i.e., impact cash flow, team and referrals coming into the office. It’s vital to learn how to quickly calm yourself and diffuse stressful situations to stay focused, and in control–no matter what challenges you face or how stressful a situation becomes.

Because let’s face it, in the world of a solo-prenuer, stress free is not an option. Stress is inevitable, it is all in how you manage and react to it.

Molly L. Hall, Co-Founder, Lawyers with Purpose, LLC, and author of Don’t Be a Yes Chick: How to Stop Babysitting Your Boss, Transform Your Job and Work with a Dream Team Without Losing Your Sanity or Your Spirit in the Process.

I remember a time when every time I suggested we have a meeting, bodies would cringe. In retrospect I don't blame them. Most meetings are wholly ineffective. But when you examine the purpose of meetings and the distinction between a great meeting and a frustrating meeting, it quickly becomes apparent how important they are, but more importantly how to make every meeting a powerful one.

Most people become frustrated with meetings because they tend to be a “bitch” session, an opportunity for people to share what's not working. Often meetings lack structure or intended results prior to the meeting. Instead they're meant as a session to “figure it out”. While on occasion these meetings may be necessary, they are not productive and often lead to frustration.

There are two types of powerful meetings. (1) The first is check-in meetings; that is, meetings on a regular basis (once a week in our office) where you check in with everyone else to see how the firm or individuals are doing as compared to the goals and standards that have been set. This type of meeting is to ensure accountability is essential for long-term personal and firm success. (2) The second powerful meeting is a discovery meeting. In a discovery meeting you bring different perspectives together from key individuals that you think are important in making a critical decision. The significance of making these meetings successful is that you must have a controlled agenda as to time and parameters around each part of the meeting that provide for:

1) brain dump time; a time where all can shoot out ideas without judgment!
2) refinement time; when all of the issues raised are refined to identify the most important and relevant ones, and then
3) strategic time; when the participants strategize a solution to the core objective for the meeting that was potentially not even conceived prior to the beginning of the meeting.

Check-in meetings and discovery meetings, when managed and facilitated properly, can be very empowering and lead to major breakthroughs in firm operations and individual growth.

So the next time you have a meeting don't cringe, make it a powerful one.

Dave Zumpano, Estate Planning Attorney, Just Like You!

What is the greatest success you’ve had since joining LWP?

We have successfully used the systems to develop a referral network from other professionals. It has gained momentum and now drives clients to our workshops, and to appointments, every month.

What is your favorite LWP tool? I appreciate the live listserv. Whenever I’m looking for an answer I can’t find elsewhere, the live listserv gives me a way to not only ask a question but to have a dialogue and drill down into an issue in detail. Then I’m able to go back to the recording later and listen again if I need to. I also learn quite a bit from hearing the answers to other callers’ questions.

How has being part of LWP impacted your team and your practice?

Our estate planning practice has become a much more central part of our practice, and we’re taking the initiative as a team to keep our pipeline full. Rather than waiting for, and responding to, the latest “crisis” case, we’re helping our clients make effective long-range estate and asset protection plans – and getting paid well to do so. The LWP community gives us a support network to make sure we stay on track.

To learn more about our membership, please visit us at www.lawyerswithpurpose.com

The average enrollment cycle in the Estate Planning arena is 9-18 months. Now, that might sound horrifically long, but it’s the absolute raw truth. And it’s no phenomenon that Estate Planning and Elder Law Attorneys that I talk to across the county are experiencing the same thing in their own practices.

The irony, the coincidence. There’s a saying my initial mentor taught me: “So go the coach, so go the coachee.” The very reason most attorneys struggle with how to guide clients to a decision is because they are unwilling to do so themselves. Which radiates an essence of the following decision making process Over explain … Process …. Deflect … Confuse … Repeat

As an industry, attorneys are incapable of active choice without a tremendous amount of internal (possibly financial) suffering. Call it a tribe of high “Fact Finders™” or law school conditioning to research and analysis until there is no law review, case study or white paper unturned. In my humble opinion, the core of the matter is none of the above. It boils down to 1 word. Permission.

Permission, is letting go of your beliefs or a structure that no longer serves you. It’s walking away from the all or nothing thinking and no longer buying into “the way things are supposed to be.” It’s a willingness to be in a place of uncertainty and move into a place of possibility.

It’s also about honoring ourselves, what we desire from life, and letting go of worry, guilt, and blame. Sometimes permission is about how you are being, and other times permission is about what you are doing. Sometimes permission is so that we can grow, other times it’s so we can let go. Permission is a conscious decision and conversation that takes place in your head — and likely your heart

Permission shows up in our life daily as we are bombarded with choices, decisions, dilemmas and change that require us decide and declare (or not). Most often, we recognize the need for permission when we have a deep need for certainty (evidence) or when we are going against what others are wanting from us. Permission is an internal battle.

We see the need for permission to show up in our life in situations as diverse as deciding on whether or not to attend an event, terminate an employee, leave a marriage, spend your savings and retirement on a new adventure or if you should join a new organization (again), parenting, whether to go home at night, take time off of work. The list goes on and on.

Once you recognize the role permission plays in your life, you’ll see how almost every decision and choice is being driven by this silent control freak. When we can bring awareness to this internal meter of “right, wrong, good, bad, yes or no,” we can move into a place of being able to make the choices that are best for us at the time — without endless research (fear), guilt, shame and the need for certainty.

Well, maybe there will still be a little fear, but fear is a motivator and adaptable: especially when you are operating from a place of permission instead of resistance. At the end of the day giving you permission boils down to putting the oxygen mask on yourself first. And that’s a hard nut for most of us to crack.

The client really wants to make certain they protect their daughter from that good for nothing son in law. But without permission the selfish, judgmental voice speaks in stereo. Many attorneys have been asked by their clients at the end of the vision meeting, “Tell me what to do?” And likewise from attorneys that are about to make an investment in joining LWP.

But I can’t tell them what to do, and even if I did, it wouldn’t relieve them of any pain or uncertainty because they haven’t given themselves permission to decide and declare. They can take my advice but it won’t work because they didn’t come to it on their own. However, if I own my role as a shepherd, guide, coach and unwavering stand to lead them to a place of permission, to allow decision, decision is made. With confidence, peace and maybe even a bit of excitement.

What makes our LWP community unique is we hold our members accountable to their path and plan while providing the infrastructure to achieve it. Our members tell us they are accomplishing their goals, can finally delegate , trust their team to lead, while making more money and feel confident it won’t all break. This isn’t all our members, only the ones whom have given themselves permission. And I feel strongly that is the value proposition you bring to your clients, to declare and commit to a path and plan they believe in.

Molly Hall